Costello: "Doc Says I Can't Play!"

Patrick Costello

Dutchman Forward Patrick Costello has confirmed that he will not be able to play for the forseeable future due to a dislocated shoulder incurred while "messing around"  with Defenceman Graham Cuthbertson.  "We were moving s*** around in the dark, and the rest is history," said Costello.  "Doc says I can't play."
      "I don't even know what happened, to be honest," said Cuthbertson. "One minute we were lifting a couch or something, and the next thing you know, Patrick's standing there, white as a sheet, telling everyone to get away from him.  It was pretty funny.  By the way, everyone should check out the trailer for our play on Youtube.  It's called 'Gordon' by Morris Something."(playwright Morris Panych).
 

    David Wheaton had little to say on the incident. "I don't have much to say.  I haven't done a play in a year, and it's for this very reason.  Lots can happen when you mess around with that (stuff).  Trust me.  I know from experience.  It can be very, very dangerous.  Like, broken arm dangerous.  So, I make a rule for myself:  No Theatre during league play!  No movies during league play!  No auditions during league play, lest I somehow get a part!  I don't even go to theatre parties.  I wouldn't go even if someone invited me to go!   So that way, I can fully dedicate myself to the Dutchmen with minimal risk of injury, to my body, or my ego.  But that's me.  As John Wayne said, 'A man's got to do what a man's got to do.'  So, I guess that, in some way, Patty must've felt he had to do this.  For himself.  For some reason only he knew.  I mean, take me, for example.  I scored 4 goals last week, so..." 

    When asked how he got the shoulder back in, Costello asked "Ever see Lethal Weapon, Part Two?"
"Nope," he was told.  Then he let out a long sigh.
    "Yeah, well, you should check it out.  It's a great movie." he said.  Then, rising to leave, said "Alright?  Is that good? Good.  I'm done.  Take me to the Hospital."

Cuthbertson going home after being eliminated from Championships

Cuthbertson says he "will keep Dave posted," about his availability tonight, before continuing,  "The play's called 'Gordon'; just type 'Gordon Grocery' into the search bar.  Thanks, guys."

    The Dutchmen play All In tonight at 9:30 (BBC).